How did you select your wedding party? Choosing your wedding party is a carefully crafted task. You want to choose people who are near and dear to you and will be an overall support throughout the wedding planning process. Many brides and grooms select friends and family members to be a part of their wedding party. These individuals may reflect the specific times in the couples’ lives. One of the biggest questions they may have is, “how do we get everyone to get along?” Many times, members of the wedding party do not know each other from the get go. Or perhaps a few of your wedding party members may have close bonds. Regardless of the bonds between one another, it is so important to create a team with your wedding party. Now, personally speaking, I’ve been a bridesmaid more times than I can count. Some of these weddings, I’ve known all of the bridesmaids and groomsmen, others’ I’ve felt like the outlier. In both experiences, I realized that it is vital to feel accepted and a part of the wedding party. So, today we’re going to dive into ways you can not only introduce your wedding party to each other, but create a lifelong bond. 

Create a Space for the Initial Meet and Greet 

Once you’ve decided who will be a part of your wedding party, it’s time to think about your initial get together! We know that bridesmaids may live near and far, but inviting everyone to a luncheon or a dinner party is a fabulous way to get everyone together to meet and greet. You can team up with your partner and create a get together with your whole wedding party or separate it by bride and groom. Now, for the wedding party members that are out of town or even across the country, you want to make sure you include them at this time. Whether you set up a facetime call during the meet and greet event, or include them in the invite – you never want anyone to feel left out of wedding party activities. 

Communication is Key!

After everyone has met one another and puts a face to a name, create a way to communicate effectively with your wedding party. You can create different group chats as a way to keep communication flowing and to ensure that everyone is informed of wedding day information. This is a great way for everyone to discuss ideas, concerns, and learn about details. As a rule of thumb, be sure to include everyone in messaging including attire, wedding details, and bachelorette or bridal party information etc. Be open and honest with your communication and remember it is okay to set norms with communication! 

Maid/Matron of Honor & Best Man 

Your maid/matron of honor and your best man are there to help you! You want to utilize these people to head some of the communication front. Their job is not only to support you with wedding planning and support on the wedding day, but to support your wedding party throughout the process. It is more than okay to give them tasks to keep your wedding party informed and communication up and running. In addition, they can create and invite the wedding party to any events that may be necessary, including dress shopping, fittings, or any bonding events that you want to occur. Encouraging your wedding party to be engaged throughout the process will help bring your wedding party together and from positive relationships. 

Bachelorette & Bachelor Party

This is one of the most traditional ways for members of the wedding party to gather and form friendships or bonds prior to your big day! Typically your maid/matron of honor and best man plan the bachelorette and bachelor party. But, this is a great way to get other members of the party involved and share the financial load. Encourage collaboration when building these events and find something that each individual person can be in charge of or work on. Including all members of the wedding party and finding mutual grounds for members that must travel is important. Hint - hint, we love ourselves a destination party. Use this time as bonding for the party and of course, to celebrate the love we have for the bride and groom. 

Wedding processes can be stressful, but it can also be a time to make new friends and create lifelong memories or bonds. As you select your wedding party, think about ways to keep each individual engaged and special throughout the process. They are your support system, your go to guys and gals – and you want to create an inclusive AND enjoyable experience for all. Be sure to host an initial meet and greet so everyone can meet one another. This allows your loved ones to meet each other and begin building friendships with one another. Always keep your communication fluid and accessible to all! Creating a group “central” messaging system is the best way to include all members and keep everyone up to date. As planning begins, include all members of your party, including the gals/guys that live out of town. Most importantly, enjoy your wedding party and create long, lasting memories with them. These are your people, so celebrate them too. 

Lori Losee is the owner of Elegant Affairs, a Seattle Wedding Planner with over 18 years of experience. We create awe-inspiring experiences—Events filled with meaning and refined elegance. Behind the scenes, our experienced team collaborates on each stage of the process, executing your vision and a wedding, celebration, or corporate event that is unique to you.